Tag: Love
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Peace in the Chaos

I have felt too overwhelmed to put thoughts into words. I have felt like my words wouldn’t matter or even make sense. I have been too overloaded mentally to process through the chatter in my head. I am finally feeling some mental and emotional space, so I thought I would give it a shot. I…
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Life is Bittersweet

From “The View Between Villages” by Noah Kahan “Passed Alger Brook Road, I’m over the bridgeA minute from home but I feel so far from itThe death of my dog, the stretch of my skinIt’s all washin’ over me, I’m angry againThe things that I lost here, the people I knewThey got me surrounded for…
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We Are Not in Control

As moms, from the moment we find out we are pregnant, we want to protect our babies. We want them to thrive. We have dreams of who they will become as older kids, teenagers, and adults. We have an idea in our minds of how that will look from the moment they are born. We…
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9 Years Sober and My Beautiful Life

Today I’m celebrating 9 years (3287 days) of sobriety. I am in the same place that I was 9 years ago when I decided to take myself to rehab (my parents’ house). Robert was out of town, and the kids and I were visiting my parents. I got drunk the night before (the 11th) as…
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Sacred Unraveling

SACRED. Holy. Set apart. Divine. UNRAVELING. Threads loosening. Coming undone. Letting go. Surrender. Through the mess of unraveling, I have developed a deeper relationship with the person of Christ. He has been right there with me as I have been learning who I am and slowly lowering the mask that I have been wearing my…
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Exhausted but Content

This past week or two has honestly been pretty tough. Mostly because I’m flat exhausted due to working so much. I have one more day of work, then I’ll have a day off. And the rest of the week is a bit lighter. In twelve days, I’ve had one day off. That isn’t normal… Normally…
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The Messy Middle

I’ve spent most of my adulthood going in between two extremes. There’s a lot behind this. Part of it is a trauma response… feeling like I need to fix myself. Some of it is because I’m constantly seeking dopamine due to a lack which means “shiny new things” are always appealing. I am also an…
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Processing Through Journaling

I just thought I’d share my journal from today. It was a little scattered but also pretty helpful. I’m learning more and more about myself. I realized yesterday that I have been battling the weight/body image/nutrition/exercise battle for a long time, and I have never sought God’s wisdom on it. WHY am I so obsessed with…
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No Longer Shrinking Myself

After four doses of my new medication, I’ve already started to feel noticeably better. I didn’t think that was possible because I have read it can take up to 2-6 weeks. But then I googled and realized that a lot of people noticed a difference almost right away (especially if they were in a depressive…
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As I Reflect on 2024

Spending some time alone this last morning of 2024. As I reflect on this year, I have had some high highs and low lows. Some days felt impossible. Some days felt as though my mental health had healed. While it’s sad when I realize my brain still struggles some times, my therapist reminds me to…
