One of the things that I have been working with my therapist on is perfectionism and all-or-nothing thinking (and living). It has always been a major challenge for me my whole adult life pretty much (well, and before I’m sure). Working with this therapist has been such a different experience for me than the past several. I honestly think God gives me the therapist that I need for the season that I’m in!
Planning, Scheduling, Routine…
I always want a strict routine, but I struggle to keep one. I mean, life just doesn’t allow it. We are in camp ministry… and we all work. The kids and I have different schedules. Our weeks are different every single week. We are also trying to fit school into that. And appointments. And church. And I’m trying to also fit in my workout/race training schedule into all of it. Instead of being stressed by the lack of regular schedule/routine, I’m learning to look at each week individually and just plan around our crazy schedule. We do school on the days/times that we can. It has been going SO much better by just taking one week at a time. It also helps me learn to focus on today!
I love the planner that I have! I use it to plan one week at a time! I didn’t follow this plan 100%, but I followed it pretty closely!
Race Training, Fitness, and Nutrition
I have a workout calendar/schedule for my race training and Street Parking workouts, but I also know that life will get in the way of that! Often! Like, this weekend I need to do a 5 mile run, but I’m not sure if I will because it has been snowing alllll day. It might still be around tomorrow as well. And my treadmill motor stopped working (super sad about this). I will just fill in these days with Street Parking workouts and pick back up when I can!
This is my tentative race training plan! I’m working up to a 25k in August. I’m not sure if I will be able to do that race because it has a HUGE amount of elevation gain, but I’m going to try to work up to it! On May 4th (next Saturday), I have a 5k. I also have planned to run a 10k, half marathon, and then that 25k. Every race is a build up to the next. I am also fitting in Street Parking because I want to continue doing resistance training. I believe it’s important!
I pulled out my Street Parking nutrition template again the other day. I printed on cardstock and laminated the pages. I have the fat loss template for the higher weight range, but I’m going to use it as is because my goal is to be able to fuel my body. I covered the numbers because this is a paid product. I’m going to be somewhat flexible with it, but in the next few days I plan to come up with a list of my meals that I eat regularly and just go ahead and figure out portions, etc to make it simple. I also printed a TON of simple SP recipes that I know my kids like for dinners (and some breakfasts). There are some good ones! My kids all love the burger casserole. One of my picky kids ate 3 bowls of it Monday night!
Again, my goal is fueling my body. I’ve lost 11 pounds recently pretty quickly, and I want to feel less tired. I’m doing so much running these days (on hills which feel hard!) in addition to some WODs and working an active job 2-3 days per week (working on a challenge course). So, I am trying to focus on fueling! My adhd meds make me not as hungry, so I have to be intentional. I never thought this would be an issue!
Our Home School
I have gone back to doing school with the boys instead of having them do everything independently. Now, they just do math and their novel studies independently. I was talking with my therapist about feeling like a flake because I keep changing how I do school, and she told me that it actually shows that I’m learning flexibility to do what my kids need in the moment. They were doing great with independent work for a bit, and now they need something different. That’s okay!
I have gone from a lot of reading/workbook type school work to a lot of hands-on. It’s so much better for them, actually. And me as well! It takes less planning/prep because I’m not having to create their workbooks. We may be in a season in the future where we go back to more independent work. Whatever works at the time is what works! I’m here for it!
Wednesday, we used a hands-on activity to learn the Feudal System. Karis joined in! (this was an adjustment that I made to my history plan, and it was a great change)
In The Brave Learner, Julie Bogart talks about seasonal schooling! And I really think that’s a thing. I don’t think it even has to follow the typical seasons of fall, winter, spring, summer. I think it just involves the different seasons of our lives in general. I’ve also heard it called “Tidal Schooling.” You just go with the flow of the tides! There doesn’t really even need to be a way to label it, but it’s so helpful to realize that our ups and downs of schooling are normal.
I’ve also learned that while having a loose plan for the future (homeschooling and life in general) is great… it WILL change. So, there’s no reason to be super detailed with anything and waste that time!
On another note… I have been looking into co-ops and homeschooling academies in the area. I was thinking that it could be good for the boys to be around other teenagers once or twice a week. Robert and I have decided that it’s not right for our family. For one, we want the flexibility that homeschool offers, and if they have a scheduled day or two of classes every week, we won’t have that. Secondly, they only offer Enrichment classes. If there were good class options that would take some of the work off of myself, then it might be worth it. But, I don’t want to just add more to our plate. And lastly, with our camp schedule, we just don’t know what life will be like from week-to-week (like I have said above). Robert and I (and the boys) have decided that it’s just not for us. Oh, also, the kids now work with other teenagers often in our kitchen here at the camp! So, they are developing friendships that way! Some are in public or private school, and some are homeschooled. It’s such a great opportunity for them.
The kids are doing SO well with working here at camp. They mostly work in the kitchen. They love the new food service director. She’s so good with them. She’s tough and has high expectations, but she also encourages and loves them well. They are learning so much about work ethic and life skills that will carry them into their future!
Some days I worry that my brain is slipping back into depression/severe anxiety. Then I get sleep and realize it was just a bad day and I was tired. Now, I’m starting to realize it ON the rough day and am learning to give myself grace.
Yesterday was kind of a rough day. The day before, I worked the ropes course all day and was so exhausted that night. Then I had a rough night of sleep. I just couldn’t fall asleep! Then, I had to get up at 6:30 to be at work at 7:30. My energy was SO low while I was working which makes the work so much harder (it’s very active work). I was just exhausted all day and couldn’t get it together. I started to try to fix non-existent problems, change things that didn’t need to change, and drop some things that were important to me. Last night I realized that I was trying to “fix” things again and just immediately stopped myself and switched gears. I reminded myself that after a good night’s sleep, I would feel better. I got like 9-10 hours last night, and today has been SO much better. This is the cause of my inconsistency with things in the past… I would get overwhelmed and just quit things that felt like too much but were important to me.
Also, I’m realizing how important rest and recovery are in general since I workout a lot and am very active. I took yesterday “off” (well, I worked which was a lot of movement). I didn’t do an official workout. Today, I will workout. One day at a time.
Today I’m doing pretty well. Tomorrow might not be as great. Who knows. One day at a time!
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