I have lots of thoughts… I hope they make sense. They are a bit jumbled in my brain.
I usually come up with a word for the year, and I wasn’t planning on having one this year. I don’t know why; it just wasn’t on my mind.
Early in November, we had a guest here (with Robert’s best friend) that told me that we were the most life-giving family that he has encountered. I’m sure we were somewhat on our best behavior, but gosh, through that I realized that I have grown so much. Despite feeling bad much of the year, I was determined to grow, love well, and pour into my family. Through that, I have learned how to manage my anger and frustration better, and I don’t lose it much anymore. I try to speak kindly to my family and friends; to speak in a way that makes them feel loved and wanted. I definitely don’t meet that expectation every time, but I’m getting there! Through that, I have realized that it has grown our family so much closer and it has allowed me to see others’ perspectives. I also used to get super jealous of people who seemed to have best friends (and I felt like no one liked me). I’m learning to celebrate with them that they have people who love them. I’ve also begun growing closer to others through this.
I plan to just keep working on growing in these areas. It’s a daily practice and change in unhealthy interpersonal habits that will continue that growth.
In addition, I view these words (life-giving) as a vow to say yes. To do the hard thing. To play with my kids. To be outside more. To run a half marathon, paddle 20 miles on the Pecos, and continue to homeschool in a way that brings us all joy.
I won’t get it right all the time. But I think that’s the point.
Living life means making mistakes, being human, learning, and growing.
I want to grow in my relationship with Jesus and lead others to Him. He has given me life, and I want others to have that life also.
I want to pour into others, but I also want to get well. I will keep saying yes, even when I don’t feel well, because that gives me life as well. It makes a huge difference in my mental health and in relationships with others. I’m working hard to find the source of my symptoms. I’m pretty positive that it’s severe inflammation. We’ll see!
I hope to be more consistent with AA.
I want to finish my childbirth education training and plan to soon!
Ethan has been struggling with his mental health and I will continue pouring into him until he feels safe.
I will continue working towards being the wife that I want to be.
This is all stuff I have been working on… I’ll just keep going!
Do you have a word for the year? What is it? Why did you choose it?